Is your coach aware that your W has said that YOU have to make the D happen, and that in the beginning you said “if it happens, we will do it together,” but that now you have changed your mind, and you do not plan to initiate the D?
Yeah, I told him this, and that she feels "betrayed" that I've changed my mind. He simply thought I should be prepared for all outcomes, up to her actually having something ready for me to sign (which I would look over with her, but then take home with me).
I think she is likely to want to take the next step, which is to meet with a mediator.
My coach thinks that because she's dug her heels in, the approach that's most likely to work with her is for me to challenge her assumption that I want to stay married even if it makes her miserable. He feels like as long as she has this assumption, she will do anything to get out of the marriage.
