I've missed out on some important goings-on here. I'm sorry about your mother's illness, but glad that she seems to be doing well--lucid, in good spirits.
What a shame that your W is not able/willing to open her heart to you or your mother at this difficult time, but as you say, that is her choice. It's a sad one, but it's the road she has chosen.
I'm still with you, Nicola
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan