H wanted to go for a drive today. I knew that meant "talking" again but it was his initiation and although he doesn't usually like to "talk", especially about our sitch, he obviously needed to get some things out in the open.
We talked about him being too independent and not "needing" anyone in his life - especially his loved ones (including me). He seemed shocked when I told him I used to dream he would one day tell me how much he needed me in his life - what spouse doesn't want to hear that? He just sat there and stared into the distance and said "I never have, have I?" - I thought, no you haven't, not even once in 18 years.
He sat there for a few minutes longer and sadly said, "I've never told anyone that".
How pathetic am I? Staying home for NYE - but at least H and I are going to watch a movie together. He's sleeping right now (which seems to be about 90% of his life - regardless of the AD he's taking) but I plan on being light and just having a good time. I've bought his favourite bottle of wine (which he doesn't know about) and intend on making some nice snacks for the two of us while watching the movie. Now, if he would just get it out of his mind about inviting his friend over (this is the one that seems to spend more time with him than anyone else - I am beginning to wonder (kidding)
HAPPY NEW YEAR's everyone - I hope 2007 bring you all the best of happiness and health
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
(kidding)
