Ok, I need either some smacks upside the head or some heavy prayers headed my way. I have dipped down in my mood today. Didn't hear from H yesterday and when I went online to check our bank account, I noticed a charge at the post office near OW house. It isn't that he was at her house, since he is living with her right now, it is that he never goes to the post office. It has my mind in all kinds of situations...is he changing his address to her place....is he sending me a certified letter.....Got to get this out of my mind. AGH!!!!
I know it is stupid but I hang on to every word that he says to me, especially the ones that imply hope. I know I am not suppose to believe most of what he says to me, but those things seem to keep me in the mind frame that our M will be restored. I have told him that I hang on the words that he says to me, so would he do it again just to crush me??!?!? I don't know. I think I am going to talk to him about it when I see him. Hopefully he will give me a call today and we can talk tonight.
Let me have it.
"Be patient to persevere and wait for God to heal. Keep in mind that you are both imperfect people. Look to God as the source of all you want to see in your marriage and don't worry how it will happen...Leave it in His hands."
