I agree with you. But that’s not what I said. I said I would like her to have a boob job. When she went off on me I told I would also like to have a wife with a tight ass too. Maybe I would like a blond, or someone with really long legs, whatever…. Yep, she did just as you are doing and pulled it right into HER FOO, not mine.
When I asked why she was upset over it she said is was because of the implied subjection of women, of controlling and dominating them, etc. I told her my statement had nothing to do with that, which it doesn’t. All I did was to say what I would like. SHE took it personally, just as you are doing. She even realized that she was reacting to her own FOO issues.
That was also my opening to uncover the fact that she was really reacting to her own hurt feelings, and the principle of feminism was really not the core issues, just a deflection. She was mad at herself because she allowed herself to be vulnerable and I hurt her feelings. But she did not want to admit to that, which is a major issue in our marriage. So I make NO apologies for that statement. It did a WORLD of good.
Mojo has also debated this subject quite a bit – whether one should be honest with your own wants, whether to express those wants, whether to worry how the spouse responds to those wants, whether the spouse should actually respond and how to respond when the spouse ignores you. No difference here. As Mojo came to realize (and I believe all your ladies supported her), there is nothing wrong in being honest and expressing what you want. It is up to the other person whether to meet those wants or not. Then you can decide whether the have hurt feelings or not.
IHJ, your reaction is just what I expected. It is true to the feminist way of thinking. IMO it is also hypocritical and a subverted way of trying to turn the guilt table around on the man. Dr. Laura speaks directly to this matter. Maybe you should pick up her book.
