I also believe that she feels safe in getting angry at you because she knows you will never leave her. All the more reason to just let her work this out while you stand steadfastly by. At some point, y'all may be able to work on this together, but not yet.
It's kind of like a child throwing a tantrum. He feels safe in doing it because he knows his parents aren't going to throw him out in the street. Like IHJ's daughter getting her hair cut-- that shows that she really trusts her parents. I was a perfect child when I was young, because I was too scared to be anything else. Your W being angry with, at, and around you shows tremendous trust.
