Do you see how those responses take away from her dignity? They imply that she CAN'T TAKE CARE OF HERSELF. Is that a light bulb over your head?
It's a lightbulb, but so far only a dim one:
I see from her past responses that she's suffered a loss of dignity in these situations, but I don't REALLY get why.
Oh. Yeah. Now I do. I'm overreacting to her...so I can get a response. Whether I'm being the well-meaning teacher or the guilt-provoking parent, I'm still taking a superior position.
Just acknowledging her anger validates her without making her feel like I think she needs me to solve her problem.
Sheesh.
I've been making her feel like that for a long time, and she's taken it. No wonder I feel like she's "rebelling" against me. No wonder she's lumping me in with her parents and pastors.
