do not engage further on this topic. Don't try to fix her, teach her, or analyze her.
She was baiting me, and it's true that I was totally at her mercy once I'd responded. Odds are, she would have felt bad even if I hadn't made an attempt at justifying myself. But she could just have easily said "bullsh!t" ... he's making that up.
So I'm not going to reply, because she's trying to pull me into the pit.
