Got back late from ER. W has left to go on a field trip with D5. I have to work from 12PM to 11PM so we won't see each other today other than goodbyes this morning.
I'm kind of in a lost state right now. She talks about wanting a D, even thinking about a lawyer, doesn't intitiate any contact with me yet says its okay if I hold her hand or touch her. Last night/early morning at the ER I put my arm around her and held her hand. I asked if this was okay with her and she said, "I told you I don't mind that stuff". She came over to me this morning to kiss/hug goodbye.
Where the heck am I in this process? I want a D.., lets ML?! I want a D..., lets go see a movie together?! I feel totally discombobulated today.
I keep hanging on to something she said yesterday, "I don't know, I'm confused". Hopefully that is a good thing for me since she isn't yet resolute regarding the pursuit of a D.
