It helps me to get asked questions like this. It is exactly why I decided to start posting again. My H will not label what we have, because as far as he is concerned, we have nothing. He is not "seeing, or talking to" anyone. I am his wife when he is here, but the minute he leaves, he is a free man. I guess if I asked him, he would probably say we were friends.
I think right now it is a loyalty issue with him. If he decides to go back to the OW, he will be able to say he wasn't working on his marriage. He does talk about his behavior, and even admits he is in MLC. Once in a while we touch on where he is at, he says he is just trying to find the answers, that he knows he won't be like this forever. I'm not so sure, I'm beginning to believe he could be like this forever.
As far as the overnights go, we have been intimate on a semi-regular basis since last summer. It has increased from maybe once every two or three weeks to once a week. That seems to be the one thing he can be constant about. Although, it is still no strings attached. I guess we are using each other a little bit. I use it just to feel close, he uses it for...well, I guess I'm not sure, other than the obvious reason. I guess I never understood how he could cheat on her, when he supposedly loves her so much.
I am finding it harder and harder to hang on. I have heard everything he has said this last week before, and yet nothing ever changes. I remember back in June when I thought this would end in July. Then I thought it would end in September, now December is almost over, and I am still waiting.
My GAL is still going strong. I go out with friends, but I admit, I am usually willing to change plans if he calls. I know that's bad, but I don't want to appear too busy, and have him run back to her, just because he had nothing to do one night.
I'm not sure I how I made it this far. I look back now, and can't believe what I put up with. I would say the end is near, but I said that already, back in July I think. The end is way off in the distance. I wish I knew a faster route, but I guess it's true what they say about it taking as long as it takes.
