Quote: When H was expressing his concerns how did you respond?
I think I was positive and gently reminded him that HE was the one that wanted the D. I mentioned that we would need to work on our R together. My only negative part was he needed to accept me as I was---even if it included a cluttered house. I told him I had been trying to make the perfect house, but it just wasn't happening as fast as I would like. At that time he said he understood and could tell I was working on it.
I have been decluttering one room at a time. I had been doing pretty good and had good intentions during the time he was away at school to really make a major dent. The night he surprised me by coming home was not good--kitchen table was completely covered with stuff (mail, newspapers, wrapping paper, etc)! It was not a good first impression. And then I got upset over the fact he asked this "new friend" to pick him up at the airport.....the weekend went from bad to worse.
Now I am pretending he will be home every night so try to do a little every day. I try real hard to have the kitchen area looking nice because that is the room you come into from the garage.
I have avoided talking about ow. I praise him for little things. I have mailed him funny cards and small gifts while he is away. I invited his friends over for dinner while he was home.
