This time of year compounds our emotions, up or down. I had a short phone call to my dad tonight as I was consumed with one of those moments you describe and just needed someone or something to grab for a moment of sanity. We shared our common ground. He lost his W (my Mom) a few years ago to a stroke. I lost my W to something very very similar. Both were fatal to our M. Both will be very hard for us to get past. We both loved my mom. We both loved my W. They are both gone. It hurts.
But after a few moments, we hung up, I turned on my tree lights and poured first drink in three weeks. Started cleaning around house to keep busy. We find things that help us shake it off. That is all we can do at those lowest moments, while we hold our breath and wait for it to pass. Focusing on it makes it last longer. Let's don't. Let's look at some lights and see them sparkle. Let's think about who we might be looking at those very lights with this time next year.
I don't know who I will be with. Maybe someone new. Maybe my dad or my sons. Or maybe with the new me, someone I very much look forward to getting to know this coming year. My Christmas wish is for you to find that same someone in your life.
