11th hour Help!!!

[onlylove]

Dear 25yearsmlc,

I have learned that not all lawyers are bad, you have proven that point. I have two kids a D16 and a S7. They have not been told about the D yet. The WAW wants to tell them on Dec 29th. I also live near LA so we are working under California laws. My D ask me to get W out of the house last Saturday so not to spoil her 16th birthday party with her angry attitude. My W does not see that the kids are separating from her already. I’m scared for her that they may not want to live with her at all if she goes through with the D.

Yes she just turned 40 in August; she started the affair in July. So a part of this is a MLC. Looking back I have not been very affectionate to her for years because of her anger. So I left her all alone to deal with this anger thinking she would work it out and because it was hard to get close to someone who was always angry. Will now I she that I should have pushed the issue to resolve the anger, too little to late I guess. Secretive? YES Distracted? BIG YES.

The hard part right now is that she is leaving because a lack of emotional and physical support by me. So I do a 180 and learn how to give this to her, but she is not open to accepting this from me. So what do I do? I just keep showing her that I’m working on me and MAYBE she will open up and start talking and giving us a chance.

The only reason she gave me for leaving and getting a D is that her soul is dead and she needs to end the M. She give the standard lines “We should have not got married, we are not compatible” “I love you but I’m not in love with you” “I do not have the love to sustain a marriage with you” Even the consoler is not buying this and tried to get her to talk. She would not; so the consoler scheduled a session with just her for last Thursday. When I came home from work I did not ask her any questions on how the session went. She finally said that she scheduled a couple’s appointment for this coming Thursday. I said I thought we were going to have individual sessions, she said we need to work on moving forward, meaning the D. I have an individual session tomorrow and I hope to get some incite on her from the consoler. I’m hoping the consoler got her to tell her why she feels the M is dead.

My WAW has lost her faith. She sees me reading the bible and I feel this bugs her because I maybe passing judgment on her, not true at all. I get a since of calm from read the good book.