In think he tries to throw his self-contempt onto you and when you show him you are above him, he becomes aroused. Wasn't it Groucho Marx who said " I wouldn't want to belong to a club that has me as a member?" I think there is something to this dynamic with your H ( my H was like this too, he kind of pushed me into b*tch Journey, which is really not my thing). Since he doesn't seem to buy into my fantasy life of submissive Journey, we've compromised by being ourselves and trying to get aroused with that, which ultimately is a good thing to do. You and your H do have more fun, though.
