It's true, we don't know each other...I also agree with you about keeping up your appearance and not letting your mind go to waste.
I, too, had an A...lack of attention, concern for me, etc. in my M. I didn't leave per se...I was divorced. That was 11 months ago...my XH is testing the waters in trying to see if it can be salvaged...a victim?...no, just someone, like you, who thought the other side of the fence was going to be better...the sex wasn't that great, the care and the conversation was. But when I was caught...I admitted to it, although, there are times, when I wish I hadn't...but that is history.
I don't pre-judge you...but, how could you have done all the things to try and change your M, when he just recently told you things that bothered him?
If you are really adamant about leaving, then do so, quickly...so you both can heal. Good luck to you, no, I don't walk in your shoes...that's why I can say Good Luck to you...