I never kick H out of the bed. Back in Spetember when H said he wanted a D cuz he could not stand to be around me anymore & he didn't love me, H decided to sleep in the other room for around a month & then slowly moved back to our room. The 1st time he spent the nite out overnite I was angry & just put my dd to bed w/ me and when I saw H did not mind, I did it again this last time he did not come home. My dd has ALWAYS never like sleeping by herself, even when she spends the nite @ grandmas' she begs to sleep w/ grandma. What should I do about going out myself? I know I need to GAL, but this seems to get H angrier. When I do he takes the girls out w/ her to push my buttons. I RARELY do go anywhere cuz i don't know wny sitters & can't afford for all three most of the time. I will go to the library.
he prob didn't say anything, but that didn't mean he didn't mind.
I have two kids, and yes, it can be hard to go out if you 3. even if you out once every two weeks leaving the kids w/your mom, that's something. Also, making yourself look pretty helps, I can't believe how I let myself go before. With all the mess that happened I lost weight and started excercizing, lost some more and started wearing make up again, bought clothes that fit nicely and I felt so good, that's another way to GAL. Does he take the girls out w/her EVERY time you go out?
Do try to do things that make you happy, whatever you used to do before for fun.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
I just returned from vacation. My H did not know that I had asked for vacation time on the same week as his and by the second day he was becoming frusturated and asked if he would have to be home with me the whole time that he rather go back to work and I just told him that I was not paying for the girls to be in daycare the entire winter break and be broke cuz of it. He then realized that I was not off to check on him and calmed down. Guess what God does work in mysterious ways! That is if what happened next was HIS idea! The day after Xmas H pulled a muscle on his back by helping his dad move some appliances. The following 3 days after that he could barely move and I had to help him w/ everything ( I didn't mind)This was my chance to shine! I cooked him and the girls breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday. Finally, one day he was hurting so badly I offered to take him to see the doctor, they gave him several shots and that evening H was feeling so much better, he thanked me AND asked me if we could go for the weekend to the amusement parks with the girls!!! Boy was I surprised! Backing up a little- H is back in our bedroom! I told him that the futon was probably making his back worse & that if he wanted he could sleep with me...Nevertheless, his cousin & his wife are the touchy, smoochy type & I could tell H wanted to be like that also.At times H would make sexy comments about my what I was wearing or my looks and I know it was to get a feel of where I stand or to see my reaction, H would softly mumble the words just so I could barely hear it. H is the type that has always waited for me to make the first move or compliment (h is really insecure & scared of rejection). Remember we had not been physical for over a month now, cuz I told him I asked the Lord to take away any desires had for him. Needless to say.... the trip went very well, a few times while we were waiting in the long lines, I would give H a big hug from behind & H would respond back! I know that in the beginning of all of this H did not want to be touched in any way, so now if I do it is breifly and then I would go on to do something else in another room. Am I doing right? I have read about distancing yourself, what is that about? I took the girls to daycare yesturday so we could be alone and... even though I made the first move... we finally made love!! I know i did not perform as good as I wanted to, but I could not get out of mind him and her while were doing it!! Yes, the last two times I went out and left the kids w/ him he has taken them w/ her!! I cannot depend on my mother to watch, she does not have the patience nor will she watch them for me. By the way I am reading the book the care & feeding of husbands & i even have the audio cds, it's great! How waa your holidays?
