I don't know about the strength. Anyone who has to deal with this sort of thing finds the strength. It's in all of us. But having the strength to do that and be happy. I just don't think I can do that.
Quoting lisakate32: maybe right now you two don't have too much in common. but you say you have common goals. if your wife won't spend time alone with you right now, maybe the best thing you guys can do is take turns. she goes for her walk. you go for a rollerblade after.
maybe having a seperate away time would rejouvenate both of you and give you some more to talk about. your kids have many activities. what about limiting some of them and spending more family time. more relaxing time. it feels like you guys are burning out.
That's what I was talking about when I said that I have to learn to accept my fate somehow. A couple of years ago, when I complained to W that we don't spend enough time together, she said that we can't. We have to take turns doing things. Well, after awhile, we started doing more together, but still not a lot alone together.
She started including me in her activities with other friends - primarily MF. This was much better but I still wanted "couple time." Well, now that our contact with MF is curtailed, we don't even have much "bunch of friends" time.
As to curtailing our kids, the thing is, it’s not that they have so many activities. We just have so many kids!
Dunno. I’d like to convince W that it’s OK to spend time alone with me. She’s just never agreed to it before, and from more recent conversations (such as they are), her attitude hasn’t changed.
Eric,
I just tried to call W. Just to talk. Had no idea what I was going to say.
But it didn’t matter. She wasn’t home.
KAW,
W has all the time in the world for the kids. Just none for me. I know you'll say that there's an opportunity here, but as soon as I get involved, she finds something else to do.
I sometimes get the feeling that she tries to spread herself around. I'm just the lowest in the pecking order.
