I have "Resurrecting Sex," and of course, the stuff in it is similar to "Passionate Marriage," which is the same as "Constructing the Sexual Crucible." I don't remember anything specific that distinguished each of these books from the others.
The essence of Schnarch is that you must push past your comfort level to truly reveal yourself in bed and outside of bed. Self-disclosure is intimacy and leads to further intimacy. I've referred recently on a couple of threads to two interviews with Schnarch that I've listened to, and both of them were terrific.
As I posted somewhere else, Schnarch says that most couples complain that they don't have intimacy, but he says couples generally have as much intimacy as they can tolerate. They collude to keep their intimacy levels tolerable and then complain that their partner either wants too much or won't deliver enough. It's up to one of them to push past tolerance.
Also he says that most couples say they don't "communicate," but he says couples communicate very well-- they just don't want to hear what the other party is communicating!
Lost, how would you describe your sitch as it is right now?
