NikkiB's new thread, new life

[NikB]

Thanks Stilltryin. I agree, lots of positives. I thought of more GAL things today that I'm kind of excited about. I feel like it's all on hold til after the holidays - right now I just can't handle much more "L" thank you very much!! But I have lots I'm looking forward to.

I do appreciate the repeat on the hyperventilation info. You made me laugh and yes, it helps to hear it again!!

I had a pretty good day today. I had to drive to the San Francisco Bay area for work, and I have to admit that I was really scared about the drive after my attack the other day. I mean if a haircut could send me into an ambulance what could SF traffic do???? I almost backed out and could've probably gotten out of it but I am SO glad I forced myself to go. I think I did great!! The traffic between my house and there is enough to make a "normal" person nuts, and I made it there no problem and didn't even get lost. I feel pretty empowered actually.

Had dinner with my brother and his wife (they live in the area), talked to them about things a bit, and drove home. It's funny how often people say "It's such a long drive by yourself!" but I kind of enjoy it. I bought the audio version of 5 Love Languages and listened to it on the way there and back. Lots of good stuff.. a lot feels like missed chances right now but if/when we get to "piecing" boy will I be ready. I guess my bro and his wife are having a lot of similar issues, they really wanted to talk more but we couldn't without all crying so we stopped... but I offered to let them borrow the CDs when I'm done and they were pretty excited to borrow them. Might be a weird Christmas gift but maybe a surprise "January out of nowhere" gift makes sense.

My bro wants us to all go kayaking in the ocean in Monterey and see the Sea Otters up close, I LOVE otters and love this idea. I want to go whale watching with them too. The kayak may be kind of challenging w/my physical issues but I think I can do it, especially with a bit of help.

I called H once all day on the way home just to let him know I was safely on the way (acting "as if" it was a normal business trip, guess it was a mistake). He got really annoyed and rude, so I apologized for calling and hung up. He called back about 30 min later and said he was sorry, then asked where I was. I said "driving" and oddly enough he asked me if I was at a bar...(????) Um no... long drive home!! He stayed up and waited for me but didn't want to talk much when I got here. Weird.