What to expect...part three

[believing_isaiah43]

Mama, I am sorry for this stuff going on (in your head, or really going on - all the same for your emotions)

The fact that he has NEVER told you the truth, or the whole truth, or owned any of it is not good long-term for your R and your trust. Period. JMO, of course, but you are just going on assumptions and emotions about the whole deal, basing where you "are" in the M on the ever-changing emotions of you, and what you THINK your H is doing. I would lose my f-ing mind if I were you.

Which is to say, you have been very strong in the face of a bunch of FOG, instead of real answers. Perhaps you need to get some. But not in a confrontational kind of way. I would venture to say you need a plan about how to talk, if you intend to, either from the wise ones here, a C, a DB coach, someone to help you be more objective and less emotional about it when you do confront your H to get answers and a plan. Instead of just floating along on more fog.

Again, though, this may not be the answer for your R, but the fact that he works with OW (who has not even been confirmed to BE an OW by your H) is el-crap IMO. That job would have to go, go, go were it me. But you know, I'm Ms. Emotionally Controlled mostly.