Thanks for the encouraging words - yeah, feelings and actions don't have to be the same, and I still have time, and now will soon have a counselor for more relation fixing horsepower. I really look forward to more concrete things to work on - the counselor seems like a lifeline just now.
Yeah, we do have to take a lot of s--t, the worst being that she now never touches me or shows affection... She has also been playing and singing to songs with words like "baby, baby, i'm leaving, i'm leaving you today...", painful stuff to hear, but maybe necessary psychological process for her. I just close her door and go some place far away in the house so I don't have to hear this depressing junk.
It seems like space, humor (what do you call a hangover? the wrath of grapes...) and no relationship talk are what is called for now )hope she doesn't ask about what the counselor and I talked about). I have a few business trips coming up which might help, and will be gone a total of three weeks, will be interesting to see if she sends email then (her first mails often signed off with the word 'love') this time. Following that is a vacation week here - hmm - hope she doesnt' want to go to Germany and OM then.
She wants to keep the house, still take vacations together, maintain our friends network, not tell my parents about our troubles - divorced but not divorced - the best of both worlds. Astimegoeson comment about not seeing his wife for weeks did sound like pressure would be removed, but my wife's way would keep the wound open, it seems to me. It would be nice to have some peace again, be it with or without my W; this not knowing is tough.
Anyway - thanks for helping - hope you can maintain your PMA also -
Best - Luke (from a finally wintery Sweden)
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
