Good to hear from you - thanks. I am all right, "hangin' in there" as I guy I used to work with used to say. It'll be interesting to see the counselor this afternoon and see if this changes things. It'll be also be interesting to see if the counselor feels we both need to be there, something I think my W would dislike (she is a proud person, sometimes comes off as arrogant even).
Yes, I agree that I should continue to be a good person for the moment, though I have often thought that I should not be sometimes (she said that I never fight back, that I am not strong enough), that being mad would be a 180 for me and surprise her. But yes, guilt and non-negative memories of her time with me will hopefully be constraints on her behavior over the holidays.
One thing that bugs me is her constantly having her cell phone with her, and getting messages she doesn't talk much about. The cell phone appears to be the channel of communication of choice with OM (came across her talking a few times in a shed outdoors, at which point she hardly says anything, and is soon done), a kind of electronic violation of our marriage. I don't spy on her, mind you, but wonder if I can trust her when she takes the phone to (her) bed.
Perhaps this is just paranoia...
Anyway - counselor in a few hours - will update you - W only knows i have something secret to do in the next town (need the car to get there) - Christmas as a cover story -
Lovely day here, just over freezing, clean white on the ground, soon the sun will start coming up earlier than 830 again -
Luke
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
