This is lengthy so bear with me. I found this today,thought it rather interesting and wanted to see what you all thought. Wasn't sure where to put it but decided it would fit here.Also I didn't copy the entire thing as it was way too long. #1 REAL MEN FEAR REJECTION-REALLY Most men feel women are very critical of them and worry if they open up someone will laugh at them,leaving them rejected & humiliated. Men's egos are more fragile than a woman's and more easily threatened,especially in an intimate relationship. He craves acknowledgement,feedback & knowing he has pleased you. If he feels you will judge him,he won't talk. Not judging means allowing him to say what's on his mind and simply being willing to hear it. Be patient,you may at some point offer an opinion. A man has to feel truly accepted for who he is,not who you want him to be. #2. REVEAL YOURSELF AS WELL There must be mutual disclosure. Show him that you have as much trust in him as he has in you. Give him feedback but don't respond by telling him how wrong he has been looking at something. It's amazing how many men feel tremendously alone. They've been taught it's unmanly to express themselves. Honest and positive feedback is vital. #3. LET GO OF THE PAST When you have "discussions" don't let them turn into a litany of past grievences,the things he did wrong,the ways he's hurt you and what he owes you now. Men cringe when they see it coming. Take responsibility for your part in a situation & see the ways in which you might have contributed to what happened. This does not mean blaming yourself. Just look at the entire situation. Focus on what he did "right" instead of what he did "wrong". The ability to forgive may be just as simple as realizing that what was true a year ago about him (and you) may not be true now. Stay focused on the present. True communication requires the ability to remain in the present & let the past be over when it's done. #4. BECOME A SOLID & SECURE LISTENER Is it even possible to have honest relationships? The assumption is that everybody's going to be honest. The truth is,few people are. The main reason is that the conquences are too big. Many men feel that women want & need to be lied to because they can't take the honest truth. Men don't want to upset them. Many women use their emotions to control men & the relationship. Ask yourself 3 things 1.)How much of the truth can you tolerate 2.) How much do you really want 3.) Do you want your man to be a fantasy figure to you or are you willing to allow him to become real? #5. BE TRUE TO YOURSELF-BE AWARE You can't be true to others if you can't be true to yourself. The best way to help a man to open up is to be open yourself-be natural-be real and exude warmth & acceptance
So,what are some opinions on this? Men & women! pfroglady
