Welp, I can officially say that we are back in a slight rut again. Things are going ok overall. I am trying to get my anger back under control with varying degrees of success. All in all, family life is fine.
The bedroom is a different story. The last two times we went to ML, it ended when my W "pulled out" so-to-speak, claiming to be over-tired and not in the mood. Both times she was the one who suggested we ML and also was the one who suggested we do it another time.
Of course, I thought I did something wrong and asked her about why she wanted to stop. She just said she was too tired. She also said because of that, she was not in the mood. She thought she would be but...
I think that she really WAS too tired but suggested we do it because of the implied expectations (last time was a Saturday night, a prime $ex night for us) and last night because I was taking the boys to school late so we could sleep in a bit. I know she thought I expected sex but Saturday was a REALLY long day and last night, well, she's been feeling pretty sick lately.
I am just feeling like maybe I could have done something differently but I THINK I did the right thing. What I did, each time, was to simply let it go, listen to her and tried to be understanding. I didn't react badly, as I have done BIG TIME in the past when things "didn't work out" (I used to get REALLY upset, going on and on about what I did wrong, etc, etc). I just told her I understood and held her while she fell asleep, which in both cases was in under 5 minutes.
I think I am going to just ask her what's up, if anything. 97% of me thinks it really is just her fatigue built up over the holidays, but then I think back to the past couple months when it's been every other day and it didn't matter what else was going on. Something just FEELS different. It's like she wants to, but mainly for me. She just isn't as into it as she has been recently.
I remember reading somewhere, maybe mars/Venus, that women tend to be "cyclical" when it comes to their drive. Is that true? It seems like it could be in my W's case. Last month, things tapered off leading up to her period and it is this time too. Then, right after...well...pretty regular again.
Actually, reading that info you posted in your post SS, it seems to suggest cyclical drive for some women and if I read it right, maybe it could lessen as the period approaches.
In any event, things have slowed down. I am reading into things a lot and I think I either need to just ask her directly, or get over it. I just want to make sure something hasn't changed in the way I am approaching things that is a turn off for her. I don't think so, but you never know.
