This EA she is in may be a little more complicated than yours was because she is seeing a OM in prison that she was once engaged to. It isn't just OM, it's somebody she loved at one time. He's been in prison for 15 years and she started seeing/writing/talking to him in 2005.
The issues she claims she had with me became amplified to the point of exaggeration. I believe in her mind, this was justification for her to see OM without feeling guilty for walking away from me. Still to this day she doesn't accept this as an A because there is no sex involved. I had my faults as does everyone else, but over all I was an attentive, loving, and faithful husband. I've know her well since H.S. so I really do go back further in her past than the OM, but I believe she has chosen him over me. She never lost her love for him, she just suppressed it.
I believe she does love me, but I don't believe it's a love that supports attraction to me. Maybe more like a brotherly love since we do go so far back. We were friends before we were lovers. This is not the kind of relationship I want if I am to be her husband. I can't be second best to any Man when it comes to the W I choose to marry. I know she is confused now between us both, but I have strong doubts she's confused about love. I really believe if she could have both of us, she would choose to, but neither he or I would tolerate it. I guess we both fulfill different needs of her's and she's told me as much, but I don't believe the "love" that brings attraction is what she wants from me,
I believe it was there for a brief time (10 yrs), but now the OM is in the picture, it won't return and our relationship will evolve back to the way it was (just friends).
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." -Mark Twain
