Quote: If anything, it has made me feel better. I have been trying to figure out why. I think perhaps it is because I was so used to getting nothing or even worse than nothing...indifference...... it gave me a little boost ........... however, I'm in a place where I don't pin any hope on it. My life IS and will be fine to continue on as it is and frankly, if there were more to it, I don't know that I'd have the inclination or energy to switch gears for some unknown.
Yep. I used to feel the same way, for most of the time xh contacted me so regularly. It IS validating. And I still feel that way about it, but it just got stuck in a very long groove!
And even though your xh may have seemed indifferent by his silence, you can't know how often he thought about you but didn't call, or how he actually felt. I do think that the fact he called after all this time, does mean he has never been indifferent.
And I know what you mean about probably not having the inclination to explore unkown and possible hazardous territory!
It sounds like a good plan to retain a lifestyle which gives you some financial leeway. You wouldn't have wanted not to be able to afford Mexico! I quite like something of a commute, it gives me a chance to unwind from the day, leave it all behind, and process it as I drive home.
Sounds like the cat sitter is working out. And being single means that we get to enjoy little forays like spontaneously going to the bar with your neighbour and hearing some music, without feeling someone is waiting for us. Another little blessing to count.
I have had a great time this week, filled with great music too. So tonight is a quiet night in. Just finished the last of the present wrapping and put some finishing touches to a Christmas wreath for my brother's grave, I am taking mum and dad there tomorrow. This time last year, I was in hospital and xh took a wreath for me, without me asking. Probably the only sweet thing he has done for me since his MLC hit! So I decided to get him a present and have just wrapped it. I don't think I will get one from him this year, for the first time, but it felt churlish to send presents for his boys and his parents and leave him out.
When do you go to Mexico? I think I may go somewhere warm and bright myself, maybe in February. North Africa sounds like a good plan.
Love
Jaybeexxxx
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers
