Mermaid, Stick to the boundaries that you've set and you'll find that you'll feel even better. It's very hard not to be drawn back into his drama at times. They all have such a way of sucking you back in. No contact will help you in this area.
I suspect your trip to see Mickey has got him a bit miffed.
You are slowly but surely healing from the experience and the grieving process takes its time. Each individual is different when it comes to grieving. Mermaid, when those feelings come over you, feel them and let them go. Each time this happens, you'll better understand more of what is happening.
Enjoy the party and be extra kind to yourself. You've worked extremely hard to get where you are today.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
