H & I are slowly reconnecting. It`s been 2 years since the bomb, & things are coming along. This past holiday season was the first we spent together in 2 years.
Just this past week he`s told me he L`d me twice. But that was after I let it slip out. Still, he hasn`t said that in a long time.
It`s one day at a time & remembering to be good to myself is what keeps me going.
Laughing. You always know just how I feel. You are such an inspiration to me. I feel a little silly making an issue out of bingo. Anyway I start Tuesday. Hopefully only 7 bingo days until I do playground supervision.
Lissette. Which Jack from Alaska are you talking about??? Actually I just read that Anne Heche dumped her husband for him. Interesting. She is not too stable now is she??? BTW he is Canadian so is her husband.
Celestial. I am glad that thing seem to be going well. I know it seems slow but I think slow is better. Otherwise he my get spooked. One day at a time is the way to do it. Dont forget to be good to yourself.
My h is not angry, not depressed, and he does not seem really happy. (maybe that is just what I see). I would think by now he would be mean to me, try to push my buttons so he could justify his A or to try to get me to d him. But no. It has been almost 7 months since I told him I would not stop him ding me. Longer since I told him to put our house on the market. But nothing from him.
I would think then he just would not talk to me and avoid me. But no. He works close by right now and he just pops in. I saw him drive by the house which is a little round about way to get from his one job site to the next. He makes conversation, eye contact and everything. He is very accomodating.
I thought he would be upset about missing Disneyland but he has not shown any feelings about it.
So what is up? No I will not get sucked back in but I am just confused. He throws little things out I think to see how I will react but no biggies right now.
Is this the calm before the storm? Or is he just going to coast like this forever?
Is this the calm before the storm? Or is he just going to coast like this forever?
I really am just curious.
You already know no one here has the answer to that. Well...someone could pick one or the other and get lucky. But no one here has the real answer to that.
Quote: Any opions would be appreciated.
Opinion. I think you are doing great. I am amazed at your patience, I think that yes you are a little confused and curious, does that help or hurt you? Sucks real bad when you see little things that give you hope at times.
Hang in the Mermaid, no one has the answers you want answered, not even your H.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Thank you for your reply. I have spent far too much time musing and mulling. I know I should not. I don't know if it patience I have or just an inability to make a decision.
Today I found out that h brought ow when he took the girls to dance class. This is my neighbourhood, my community. I don't think he has any right to bring her around here. He would not like it if I should up in his neighbourhood. So I fired off an email to him telling him that and some other things. I also told him I want no contact from him except through email and I did not want him coming by the house unannounced. I think it is time to really be tough here. Just for me. I was thinking of lifting this darkness but no I am going darker.
Thanks for letting me vent.
Hope you all have a nice weekend. I am going to my friend's 40th bday party and I have to finish painting my kitchen tommorrow.
Mermaid, Enjoy the party and don't over do w/the painting. The painting will allow you to work out your newest frustrations over the ow appearing in your neighborhood.
Mermaid, I know you were upset and very annoyed about the ow being in your neighborhood, but don't forget that you can't control the situation and he's going to do what he wants and when. I know that you fired off the email, but don't be surprised if he continues to bring her around. He's not thinking of you or what people are thinking right now. He's only concerned about himself and what makes him feel good. You'll have to try to stick to the boundaries that you've set in the email. I'm very sorry he pulled the stunt and I hope that he will read your email and understand where you are coming from.
I hope that things will settle down and your neighborhood won't see the ow again.
Have fun at the party.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks for coming by. You are such a comfort. I do know that h will do what he wants anyway but I needed to at least let him know that I have boundaries. I do want to stick with no contact for awhile. It worked so well before but h drew me out.
I know he is only trying to make himself feel good. I suspect that our trip to Disneyland is one thing that is getting to him.
I am getting better. I am starting to heal and let go and I am greiving the end of my m and this person who was my h. But it will still take time.
Mermaid, Stick to the boundaries that you've set and you'll find that you'll feel even better. It's very hard not to be drawn back into his drama at times. They all have such a way of sucking you back in. No contact will help you in this area.
I suspect your trip to see Mickey has got him a bit miffed.
You are slowly but surely healing from the experience and the grieving process takes its time. Each individual is different when it comes to grieving. Mermaid, when those feelings come over you, feel them and let them go. Each time this happens, you'll better understand more of what is happening.
Enjoy the party and be extra kind to yourself. You've worked extremely hard to get where you are today.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
