I just read your post about the Alien getting a looksee in the bathroom at you..Aren't they a riot? They are like little kids trying to sneak a peak at times..geez..
Great to hear all of your goals for the New Year. There is something refreshing about a new start, isn't it? As for me, I am just trying to get things done around the house and so far so good. The house was very neglected over the past few years due to circumstances beyond my control..
Good luck with all of your new goals, Mermaid. But I have a gut feeling you won't need any luck..You always amaze me!!!
So did you watch Men in Trees last week? Well Justine Bateman got the man. Two generations of Family Ties watchers told me I looked like Justine Bateman. I will take him but I have not found him yet
Anyway I am having myself a pity party. I am being petty. But I wish that my ds did not like ow. Yesterday when h was leaving d8 whispered to him give ow a hug and kiss for me. I know they are both too young to really understand but I read about other's children who don't like the ow or at least realize the role she plays. I know petty. My girls love everybody.
I gave h the passport applications to fill out his portion. He dropped d4 off and said he did not know what he was supposed to fill out. I thought it was rather obvious. Anyway I think that he did not want to fill it out in front of ow. He tries to have to secret worlds. I don't think he wanted ow to see any of my information.
I look at h and I do not have any feelings for him but it all still hurts some days. How could he compromise his integrity and morals and faith so much. This is not the person I married. I am a little sad that he is not coming to Disneyland. I don't mean this mlc h I mean my real h. My whole family like it should be. I am jealous that one of ds classmates parents just had a baby. I always wanted more.
Anyway thanks for listening.
I have gotten a lot on my list accomplished. I am painting my kitchen this weekend.
So remember that summer that I thought h was reconnecting. His fog was lifting. Everything was slowly falling into place. D8 got a new principal at school, one I am sort of related to. Well he got h doing some carpentry and I no longer had to do bingo for participation hours. Wel it was just icing on the cake. It was two years since I started bingo and h had moved out just one month before. D8 had not even started school yet. So after a year and a half I know it has been a struggle for h to go and do more work. So I have to go back and do bingo. I know no big deal. But it seems I am back at the beginning of this whole thing. Not emotionally but it feels so weird. H is no futher ahead in his crises and I as usual I have to pick up the pieces.
I was diplomatic with h though. I told him he would have to take the ds on those days. When he asked why I had to do bingo I said it was because "we" did not have enough participation hours. I did not blame him. (even though it is his fault).
So I feel like I must have missed something along the way. Some lesson I failed to see. I going to keep my eyes wide open.
Yes I hate doing bingo and so in the fall I will do supervision instead. Then h cannot let me down again. I am in control.
Mermaid, I'm sorry about the bingo deal. I know you'd rather be doing something else. Is there any way that you can work out something w/your h about him helping with some of the hours? After all, he's the father of your d and he should be participating just like you. Mermaid, you do what you want, but you may want to consider panning some of that time off on him. You've been far too kind in letting him off the hook on this one deal.
Hugs to you and the girls. How much snow did you get up there?
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
It is not so much that I have to go do bingo. It is really boring and anyone has something better to do. Anyway it is just that I thought everything was on an up. Bingo is a minor nuisance that I just don't want. I have thought about making h go half the time but it means I have to train him and I really don't want to. Right now it is easier to just bite the bullet and go. I just really want to do this on my own with as little help from h as possible.
Thanks for coming by Snodderly.
All our snow is gone. We did have another dump about two weeks ago and it did last but now only rain. I am not sure which I hate more. I think I need to fly south for the winter.
Thank you for coming by and your very kind words. My plan is to just do what needs to be done on my own. That is the only way to avoid any more setbacks. If I do it myself then it will get done. Afterall we can only depend on ourselves.
Just stopped by to say, I understand what you are going through. I have said (to myself) the more things change, the more they seem to be the same, several times this week. I feel like I've been put back in time, about 2 years ago when I was fighting just to receive child support. Yes, once again, I'm finding myself back at square one.
I understand how you must be feeling... I feel like I must have missed something along the way, and the reason I am here once again. Maybe it's just a part of "our" portion of the journey... who knows. I guess the important thing is that we don't just give up.
Keep your chin up, for we are earning our "Masters" in life.
You are in my thoughts.. take care of you, God Bless
Love,
Laughing
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you.........
