UGH. I know that exact feeling. My H did the same things...I think they all do. I know for a fact he would call me at night, say "Sweet dreams, I love you," and then go directly to the OW waiting in his bed. OUCH.
At this point, you can't focus on being played. You can't call him and ask for the truth--you won't get it anyway. You can't act out of anger (no matter how justified). It will just feed his desire to be elsewhere.
Have you read DR yet? If not, get it now. Focus your energies on learning how to handle yourself (you're already doing a fabulous job). Turn your attention to the only thing you have control of: YOU. GAL is about more than doing outward things for yourself--it's about finding the beautiful, worthwhile person inside of you irregardless of any of your circumstances.
That is where you'll find the strength to let him make his own choices. Pressuring him will not give you the outcome you desire--it has to come from him. Sigh...I'm sorry this is so hard.
