Not giving up even though H having an A

[not_giving_up]

Well, i don't know if we took a step backwards last night. H came over last night to watch the kids until I got home from work so that my mom could go home. My mom and I had been instant messaging some yesterday and she didn't shut it down. Well, he got on the computer and read the instant messages. It wasn't really anything too bad but enough to upset him. She just said that she has decided that she can't talk about him because it only makes her mad. I told her that was fine that I would only tell her positive things and WHEN he comes home. I also told her about a gift that he had brought to me Tuesday night. (Our anniversary is 12/11) I told her that I was surprised but hoped that it wasn't something to fill me full of false hope. I think that is what got to him. He thought that I didn't think he was sincere in it.

I told him to put himself in my shoes. I asked him if he felt like he had to get me something and he said no. I said "Great. I am glad that you didn't feel obligated." We talked R for a few minutes and I told him that this whole trust thing was really hard right now. I asked him if there was any reason that I shouldn't trust what he is telling me and he said no. So I told him that I would trust him. (Just between you, me and the whole BB....I still don't trust half of it.) I will ask him things just to see if he will tell me the truth.

I apologized to him in case I had hurt his feelings about anything that I may have said in the instant message. Then he left. He called me a few minutes later and told me that he had been called into work and probably wouldn't be talking to me today. Well, I drove by her place this morning and guess who's car was parked out front. AAGGHHHH! Trying to put it out of my mind but I may ask him what time he got off just to see if he will tell me the truth.

Anyways.....still hunting down that mobster.