Okay, this is going to sound reallly stupid, but I did something very special for myself. I bought a puppy! He is adorable and I'm now focusing on making the new addition feeling comfortable rather than dwelling in my "dark" places. H is a little jealous as he told me "well I must not be giving you the attention you crave" I overlooked this because it really isn't about him, it's about me. I have for the past 1 1/2 years put my H first in my life, even over my children (kids from previous marriage) because I was committed to making our M work despite his infidelity. H has been great trying to rebuild and frankly so have I, but we all know that it'll never, ever be the same. Unlike some of the posts, our M was pretty close to perfect before his A, H even said so. Can it better? I really don't see how you can improve on perfect.
Gotta question for all of you out there. My H is going on his first business trip since I found out about his A because I told him that the only way I would be willing to work it out was "no more overnight trips" Next week, he doesn't have a choice so he'll be gone and I'm freaking. H doesn't know that I'm freaking as I'm keeping these feelings suppressed, but I'm being flooded with thoughts of "what ifs" How do I deal with this?
