For me what worked best was to be a good listener and "friend" when he was around, keep away from personal questions, maintain my independence and PMA.... and most of all have absolutely no expectations. In fact, I fully expected my marriage to end. And with that in mind I supported his decision (to end it if that's what he wanted to do). Eventually I realized I didn't want to be married to him if he he felt he wasn't going to be happy with me.
But he needed lots of time and space to figure things out.
Good luck to you.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
