that was my H back in April, just let him know you are there for him
Quote: I am trying hard to be up, but I am feeling really tired and discouraged. I feel like I am working my butt off and I feel like no one cares. Sometimes I feel like he wishes I would just diappear
It is hard to give to your H and not receive anything, I felt the same way the first few months, hang in there it DOES get better!! I'm sure it crushes him to feel weak and he feels like a dissapointment to himself and you, it's not mostly that he can't show his love because he can't, is that he doesn't even have love for himself at this poing. My H told me "I got nothing to give you" a while before he came back. DON"T despair, your love, patience and kindness WILL pay off, your actions are planting seeds that in TIME will grow, you dont' see inmediate results but they will come IF you are patient. Don't let your emotions play tricks on you, remember, challenge every thought that comes to your head, just becaust a thought crosses your mind DOESN"T mean it is a true one.
You don't have to feel like you are carrying both of you either, as TL (or maybe GH said). It is great he is doing counceling, let him fight his own demons ok? men aren't great at discussing what bothers them, so dont' jump to conclusions if he isnt saying anything not.
I'm pretty certain he assumes you've forgiven him,why else would you have him back? but again, that's just my opinion. An awesome book you can read to understand him is "For Women Only: What You Need to Know about the Inner Lives of Men by Shaunti Feldhahn, I highly recommend it. Another must read is "healing the hurt in your marriage", it helped me so much!
Now, wake up everyday deciding to be happy
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
