Found out about H's affair

[cat03]

Hello, I'm sorry you are going through this, don 't be embarrassed and think you are crazy because you still love him, that is true love, when you love someone specially when they dont' deserve them, we've all been terrible hurt here but still were willing to take our Ss back and wanted to forgive.

I've asked my H to move out of the house, but I'm so confused and don't know whether or not to file for divorce..

Please dont' make any big desicions right now, I know you feel at some point that he needs to be kicked out for what he's done, WAS do STUPIDEST things when in affairs, it will take my family 1 1/2 yrs to pay the debt my H has gotten into when in his crazed MLC and A, they just dont' think straight, nothing your H will say or do will make any sence, the illusion is still in his head.

Please, calm down and know that as bad as the situation looks there is hope for your M, there is always hope, as long as the two Ss realize their part in the strain of the M. I guess he wanted an escape after being responsible for so much when you were on bedrest, the freedom of the ow is what he is in love with, the newness of it.

I can't believe that he doesn't realize that his relationship with the OW wasn't a healthy and lasting relationship.

You are correct, it wasn't a healthy R, but dont' try to convince him otherwise, as I've learned from someone here who cheated, there are feelings involved, and the more you deny them, the more the S clings to them.

Take it one day at a time, if he is still willing keep going to MCounceling, though sometimes if the H is still in the fantasy world a while has to go by before they see the A for what it is.

Hang in there)))))