Finding me....

[COG]

Alimari,

He is also going to go to Mexico in a few weeks and stay there over Christmas and my Bday is 3 days after Christmas

Ouch! Do you guy's just not celebrate Christmas or something?

he asked me if I wanted him to take one of the children with him and I told him no,, now my 7 year old wants to go with him and my H said that was fine ( my son said he would like to go fishing with his Dad and his Grandpa)

That sounds like a dream come true to a 7 year old boy.

but I am nervous @ it,, my son gets sick easily,, and my inlaws do not have heat or a hot water heater and I am scared my son will get sick,,

Don't make decisions based on fear. So what if your son get's sick, so what? Your H has somehow lived to maturity, your son will survive too. It's OK to suffer a little in the name of fishing and bonding with Dad and Grandpa. I was duck hunting yesterday and my teeth were chattering for hours on end. I honestly thought I was going to get hypothermia, but you could'nt have pride me out of the blind with a shovel. Not while the duck's were flying. I probably would have died right there and that's not a bad way to go. An adventure with Dad, especially a dangerous adventure, will do wonders for your 7 year old boy. Let go, and trust God to protect them.

It's OK, some people do manage to survive without heat and hot water. It just adds to the adventure. Just pack an extra sweater for him.

Also my son has my temperment and has never been alone with his Dad for 3 weeks,,

Perfect time for the two of them to be alone together. Try to look at the positive potential in this. They'll bond, and they'll make memories to talk about forever. And you'll never be able to say that he "has never been alone with his Dad for 3 weeks". Your H will take care of him.

I am very nervous and it is hard to explain why....

You're nervous because you'll be giving up control, as if you are really in control anyway.

I AM JUST AFRAID HE WILL TURN UGLY AGAIN while he is there he gets like Jeckyl and Hyde,, so hot and cold and it is exhausting,, I do feel like this time I will be stronger....and he can act up if he wants to

Good, you just stay strong, keep above it. You need to lovingly explain you'll not be treated unfairly, harshly, etc. if that happens. Otherwise, if you want the right to just be upset if you need to be, then he should have the same right. Sometimes we just feel miserable and we take it out on those closest to us. It does'nt mean you have to be pulled into the spin cycle with him. Get it?

ONLY TIME WILL TELL AND HE STILL HAS THE D*MN TATTOO

Better back off on that one. I mean better accept that he'll just have it forever and accept it. Then it'll be a really special day if he gets it changed, instead of him fulfilling your need. In either case it's not really your business. It's his body, his decision, his mistake. Don't keep reminding him of it.

Keep up the good work.

God Bless,

COG