Jay, I'm going to apologize in advance if the following comments are totally out of line.
But--
On another thread you asked about meeting people in person, and on another thread you wrote
Quote: One other thing, I so miss being with my wife and I'm already sick of taking cold showers.
Maybe, just maybe she will want that part of our relationship....
Those two things sent up a tiny red flag on my part. I'm reading nothing in your story that leads me to believe your W is ready to bail. Your talk about the therapy you're in leads me to just the opposite conclusion.
And yet... you ask about meeting people to discuss being sex-starved? After only a few posts? You phrased it in a very subtle way... but I'm wondering if you think you can meet a similarly sex-starved woman from this site?
Again, I apologize if I'm overreacting. I've been reading this board for over two years and you're the only person in the sex-starved forum (the only one I read) that has ever suggested FTF meetings EVER for the purpose of discussing these issues.
I'm sorry.... I don't mean it that way and I see and understand what your saying.....
When I've googled the area for support groups in my area, there really wasn't anything that was about "divorce busters". I know for myself, sometimes talking to other people it seems to help.
Quote: As far as her father goes, I don’t believe that someone should die alone. My wife is an RN and I’m a Firefighter/paramedic. Between the two of us, we can take care of him until it becomes too much. Lou, I think at that time we would use hospice.
Hospice comes to your house and provides in-house care for dieing people, or you can go to their office and talk to the hospice folks for advice or support. I never suggested you send of your FIL to die away from home.
Maybe your area doesn't have a Hospice outreach program like my area. Here, they along with government support, pay for some nursing care, meds, offer grief counseling, and help with some other things.
Quote: fear that this will put yet another wedge between us. My wife says it will not and that we will have that side of our relationship back again. I just don’t know when……
We went through my W's mother's illness and death and about a year later an uncles illness and death. It takes time to recover from caring for ill relatives. Don't be surprised if you still feel drained for several months after your FIL dies.
Side note; Hospice for pets???? My sister lives in an area where they even have hospice for pets through a volunteer animal organization. I think someone from the animal hospice came to my sisters house 3X a day to help her care for her dog that recently died from cancer.
Just to show you how broad the concept of hospice can be.
Thanks for the info! I will talk with my wife about that. In fact, she may already be aware of it, I just wasn't. I know that we can take him to a hospital when the time comes.
I just feel strong about doing the right thing. I also feel that way too many people split up when the rubber hits the road and I know this will be hard not only for our relationship, but M(My wife) loosing her father.
Lillieperl,
Please, don't apologie. You did the right thing by asking and after I read your posts, I can see where you were comming from. But please know this, I love my wife with all of my heart and we've been through so much together and I have always remained true to her. I have always been there for her one way or another. My problem is it just kills me inside to have to hold back the feelings and I just don't know how to surpress them.
On a different note, I looked up the book and there are two authors with the same title. One is 2002 and the other in 2003. Any ideas?????
Hube I have always remained true to her. I have always been there for her one way or another. My problem is it just kills me inside to have to hold back the feelings and I just don't know how to suppress them.
Similar boat here.
About suppressing the sexual feelings, sorry I am not much help other than satisfy as many as you can. We do have sex but it is not nearly as often as I would like and most of the time is is short.
One previous poster farmed out some of his needs like touch, and got regular relaxation massages, non sexual I assume. He might have joined some clubs that he enjoys.
