Thanks Nikki, I think your suggestion is probably best here, to celebrate our family. Now, W just stormed out, slamming every door within her reach. I had the audacity to step in and try and dampen an impending blowout between W and daughter. I backed her up but tried to stop her from making angry threats of discipline which won't be followed through with anyway, I said "please, let's not do this right now" . W turned on me! I told her I was trying to stop the blowout that we both know was about to happen. It's an easily recognized pattern. I suggested if there is a better way for me to do so, please let me know. Instead she ranted on about how she isn't allowed to "strike back" when someone "starts something" with her in this house. I said 'She's 12 years old, you and I are not" I told her that I know that at times I do this angry disciplining too. She replied angrily "did I say you did, did I accuse you of that!" I don't remember the convo that followed but at one point I just said "I think you're very angry right now and looking for a fight, I am not willing to take part. Let me know if you'd like to discuss this later" and returned to what I was doing. She said loudly "Oh, now I'm just looking for a fight!" and I replied "that is how it appears to me". She stormed over to D and told her "Your friends are no longer welcome in this house" then began slamming things and stomped angrily up the stairs. Later when lunch was ready younger D asked if she should go and get mom, I said "it's up to you but I wouldn't if I were you" She did and W told her "I have no family to eat, with so go eat with your perfect father who will protect you at all times" I kept my cool big time through all this, despite still feeling rather ill! This could have ended in a horrible blowout (it's happened before) but I refused. did I handle it perfectly? Probably not but it was in the heat of battle, did my best. Eldest D felt terrible about what happened and I told her "Yes, you are responsible for your behaviour in this situation but you are not responsible for anyone elses" So we may see W again today or not, it's her choice. she probably ran off to OP to complain about her horrible H. I feel no guilt here!
