love never fails

[runningoutoftime]

My xH is hellbent on being with this OW and there's not much I can do to stop it. It has to run its course.

This is so true. The only way you'd even want them back is if they've truly learned something from the whole experience. Otherwise there's a higher chance you could just go through the same cycle again.

This is exactly why I avoid talking to my xH now. I just can't take another argument like the ones we've had in the last few weeks. And he knows just what to say to make me feel like sh-t, so I'm not interested in exposing myself any longer. Also, I've decided I don't want him to know anything about my feelings anymore. For years, I have been an open book to him. I have shown him unconditional love without fail. Although I still love him that way, I will no longer express it.

Good for you! You definitely want to avoid any fights or negative interactions and if going dark will help that's what you need to do.

One more thing I want to add related to this.... if you do happen to talk with your husband and he asks why you are avoiding him you can think about sharing with him what I shared with my husband. I'd tell him it's not that I was angry or trying to avoid him, but I was focused on moving on with my life (which is basically where you want to be) and preparing for a great future.

If you do share anything only talk in general about the great things going on in your life, fun friends, nice healthy people (both female and male!). And then if he asks for details... well, there's no time. You need to run. And then go out and live that great life!

he's taking a lot of baggage into that R with her that he isn't even thinking about right now. In addition, she's got her own issues, as she just left a marriage and broke up a family. Clearly, it isn't going to be paradise over there...but until it moves out of the purely physical (crush stage, basically) and into a full-fledged R, my H won't see the reality.

That's the irony!!!! I remember you writing something about how he wanted to start somthing new with someone who didn't have so much baggage! Talk about jumping from the frying pan into the fire.

Maybe your husband feeds on drama like that? I suspect he may be enthralled with the idea of "rescuing a damsel in distress." If so he's entering a fairy tale.