[Burgbud]

...if I get angry, its because I feel pushed over my limit.

Just like Heather.


W can think about her actions in creating this situation and doing her part to compromise if my getting angry bothers her.

So can Heather's H.


I do not think we have completely evolved to the point that respect (and fear) is always present for the basic rights and underlying power each of us has as people. I do think we are moving in the right direction, but every now and then she seems to “forget” and needs a little reminding.

Just like Heather's sitch.


Stuffing your reactions breeds resentment and while you may make life more comfortable for your spouse, they know the have a one-up position on you.

Yet that's exactly the course you recommend for Heather. Is she somehow more resistant to resentment than you are?