Maybe I should restate that comment…. I am not proud or happy of the fact that I get angry with her, but it is a part of me and as much as I can control it, I will not try to hide it either. Stuffing your reactions breeds resentment and while you may make life more comfortable for your spouse, they know the have a one-up position on you. W has used this tactic on me before, trying to “guilt” me into being nice, which is really to say she does not want me to object to an issue she is pushing, but rather that I go along with her decision.
You know I won’t play that game anymore, so if I get angry, its because I feel pushed over my limit. W can think about her actions in creating this situation and doing her part to compromise if my getting angry bothers her. I do not think we have completely evolved to the point that respect (and fear) is always present for the basic rights and underlying power each of us has as people. I do think we are moving in the right direction, but every now and then she seems to “forget” and needs a little reminding.
