Hi guys.. I was just listening to this really neat show about Robert Lockwood, Jr. on the radio this evening. It was incredible ! I saw him in Cleveland at the Brothers Lounge back in '86.. Taught to play by R. Johnson when the master was seeing his mother... never knew that ! Passed away recently.
I recommend a CD titles "Otis Spann Is The Blues". Robert Lockwood Jr and Otis Spann (the late great pianist for the Muddy Waters Band). All killer, no filler!
Me - 47
WAW - 41
Married - 9-14-85
Kids - D14 and D12
Bomb - 1-19-06
W moved out - 5-29-06
Well we are negotiating our settlement she is a lawyer so I cannot afford to go to war with her. Hopefully she will be fair I have a lawyer who will look over the settlement. She moves out at the end of the month and I can't wait. It is much too painful to be around her I just want to end it quickly now.
Well after being together 12 1/2 years and married for 10 1/2 years we had our first real fight this morning when I mentioned that I am eligible for alimony. Not that I want it but as a bargaining chip. We sort of made up and joked about our first fight. I asked if makeup sex was around the corner and she said "nice try." She wants kids now her new thing.... but not with me.
I am really sorry. Keep you head up - 12 years is a long time and regardless of how bad the M was painted by your W - isn't wasn't all bad.
You can decide to DB as long as you see necessary. If you want to be done - then be done. Just don't ever forget what you have learned through this experience.
I really feel like we are meant to learn from this - some we figure out early - some it takes time to figure out the why part of it. Never forget the idea of creating the best life experience you can by keeping a PMA and working on the things you want to improve in your life.
Stay strong. Please keep me updated so I know what is going on.
Santhony thank you for your concern. A good friend of mine took me on an all expense paid golf trip for a week to clear my head. I saw things from a different perspective and realize that life has a lot more to offer than what I have been going through. Life is a journey and I will move on with mine. She has hers. I have learned a lot here and I am glad I went through it instead of around it. She is very unstable and I have lost all respect for her. She has hurt many people through all this. When you see your elderly parents who loved her like there own cry and then get angry you detach pretty severly.
Now I just want the D to go as smooth as possible and onward. If you love em set em free.
I will still be coming here. Look forward to your response.
Quote: I saw things from a different perspective and realize that life has a lot more to offer than what I have been going through. Life is a journey and I will move on with mine. She has hers. I have learned a lot here and I am glad I went through it instead of around it. She is very unstable and I have lost all respect for her. She has hurt many people through all this. When you see your elderly parents who loved her like there own cry and then get angry you detach pretty severly.
Now I just want the D to go as smooth as possible and onward. If you love em set em free.
Yes - this is it! You have explained how I feel as well. Life has a lot to offer - much more than what we have been going through. I will never thank my STBXW for doing this to me, but I will be always grateful for being forced to go through the storm instead of around it.
I too have lost respect for my STBXW. More importantly, I am sorry she doesn't think enough of herself to realize she can be better than that.
At this point, I want my D to happen smoothly and be done by my unAnniversary (Feb 20).
You are right my friend - if you love them, you set them free!!!
Hang in there. You sound like you are in a good place.
Long time - no hear. I hope all is well with you. I'm just dropping by with well wishes and holiday cheer for you this morning. Also, bringing by God's Coffee for you!
God's Coffee
A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee. When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.
Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups.
"Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of Life we live. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee God has provided us." God brews the coffee, not the cups.......... Enjoy your coffee!
"The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything." Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
Great post Santhony thanks hope you had a Merry Christmas. Well more drama here. Her father unexpectedly passed away on Christmas day. She seems so withdrawn and everyone is noticing. Her and my family are very concerned about her. She moved out yesterday and I love it. She will need to find a new job next month and we are divorcing. 4 huge life things all at once and she has little emotion weird and kinda scary. I am glad she is leaving my life she seems almost possesed I feel sorry for her. But I am on with my life. That is the latest. Through all of this I have gotten so much closer to her family... crazy! Hope she finds peace.
Well we reached a settlement and have filed all the papers. I am very relaxed and have pretty much accepted it and am ready to move on. If you don't have kids it can be fairly smooth. Although not quite so smooth on the wallet. I cannot imagine getting married again, but then again I couldn't imagine it the first time either! Married at 40 divorced at 50.... Sorta like it never happened. Weird man weird. But her unstableness makes me glad to be free. Over and out. I will pop in now and again for udates from this side of the whole crazy biz.
