This is just an idea so please think about this and your sitch. What you could do is tell her something like:
"Our M is very important to me and I realize that I have contributed to our problems. I intend to improve myself and my life. We both deserve to be happyand I’m still committed to develop myself into a loveable, attractive human being. We can dedicated time to MC in 2 months after we have done some more work on ourselves in IC first." Then ask her "What do you think?"
Again, this is just my humble opinion. I don't know what might help in your case.
I hope things improve for you. You do sound better.
