As rhoch and I have been trying to explain to you... well it is really difficult is it not ? Your W is in a different place mentally. Do you get it yet ???
Take Care of yourself.. YOU and the KIDS !? Everything else is out of your hands.. I am sorry.. but that is the way it is. Rise above it and do what needs to be done.
Quit making excuses for her.. and YOU. Get it together, man. (and quit dumping on some of the folks here that are trying to be helpful.).