Beth I have just caught up on your thread - my goodness the similarities are uncanny. We were the perfect couple as well. So many of my friends wished that their marriage was like ours, and my best friend looked up to me and thought how fantastic my marriage was – I wonder if I had too much pride!!! Regardless it’s happened and we all have to go forward and learn from our mistakes. I just don’t know to act and handle it all now. I will read the book again – and see what it says, and I am going to see my Church counsellors this afternoon whom I am sure will give me loads of advise. Your snooping issues – well I have snooped big time, and I am not ashamed of it. My H found out I snooped into his email – he says he feels a bit violated – but I am not sorry at all. I felt like such a mug when he had is A – because I trusted him when he asked me too. Maybe if I had know what was really going on I would not have been so accommodating – but here I go again what if’s… I will continue to snoop and make sure he is keeping his word, because I can’t go back any more – only forward. I am sorry about the gambling - the only advise I can give anyone at the moment is love has to be tough – and if this destroying your marriage you need to take the approach and say either give it up or move out. I know this is not what these boards are about – but James Dobson Love Must Be Tough is a wonderful book, and it’s the course & direction I have taken
