A new begining......

[brandnewday]

I guess it is with much trepidation that I am begining a new thread over here after being on the MLC forum for so long.

After 4 years of MLC and 2 years of separation and threats of divorce my Husband is finally coming home to rebuild our relationship.

I can see so many positives in this and he is really making an effort and for this I am very happy.

I have spent the last couple of years making changes and working on my issues which he is noticing and comments about daily in a positive way.

So I guess now the hard work comes in.

Relearning how to live with someone after doing everything on my own for so long.

Sharing the responsibilites of the kids, the bills and all of the daily stuff.

I really do not want to overwhelm him with any expectations I may have or make any demands on him.

I am trying to understand that it takes so much more courage to come home and admit you made a mistake then to run away.

I almost feel like we are dating again and this is a new relationship.

Our last visit together was wonderful.

Our physical relationship was renewed and was as exciting as when we were first married.

He is trying and that is all I can ask for.

He has apologized and I have chosen to forgive him.

We had one heated discussion when he was home which ended up with both of us apologizing and letting it go.

He feels loved and respected by me and I want to make him happy.

He is planning things for our future.

This is all so new to me and I guess I am afraid in some ways that the novelty of being in this new relationship with my Husband of 20 years will wear off and he will leave again.

I prayed for so long to be in this place and I am so grateful to have some normalcy again so why am I having these feelings?