First off, I have always been a little nervous about revieling too much personal information about myself for fear that someone, even OW, would be on this board and figure out who I am...but I cannot resist...my name and yours are the same
Quote: Mama, I realized that I was needing the intimacy from my H to fill me up and reassure me that he loves and wants me more than OW. Any time he was cold, distant, or uninterested I assumed he must be thinking of her and regretting being with me.
This pretty much sums it up for me. Like tonight, I was home before everyone went to bed. H was very tired (he gets up super early) plus he had to take D9 to her school orchestra concert. I could not take off and told him how much I appreciated that he did that (trust me, listening to 4th graders play instuments is grueling). Any way, when he went to go to bed he just stands there so I get up and give him a hug and a kiss on the neck. It's like I am kissing a mannequin. After I tuck in all the kids, who happen to go to bed at the same time as him I go in our room to remind him of tommorrows schedule since I have to work. I then try to kiss and hug him again and he just lays there, won't even let me near his lips.
Let me tell you, this hurts me deeply. Enough for me to consider being a WAS. I work in a bar with plenty of opportunity. I obviously won't go there, but at times it is tempting.
I remember when H and I first met. We couldn't get enough of eachother. Every night and every morning (usually multiple times), even if we had friends over we would sneek off and "do it". I realize now that this was the infatuation stage of our relationship but how could it go from that to this? Nothing? We are two young and healthy people, I personally do not want to spend the rest of my life in a R with a coparent/roomate. No thank you. Any ideas?
