TL is right on Mama. We all know the hurt and fear of rejection. This situation pours bucketloads on us. But at some point we have to decide to step back out of the downpour and take control of anything in our power.
Quote: In the back of my mind I keep thinking that OW is 10+ years younger than me and knowing my H he was probably really in love with her.
I've been through these feelings a hundred times myself. One night when I was really struggling, my mom looked me in the eye and said, "Regardless of any of this, when it really comes down to it, YOU have much more power than OW. You are the mother of his children, the life-force of his home. She can never come close to that. He's not with her anymore, he's making efforts..."
She's right Mama. OW may be freakin' Angelina Jolie, but he's home with you. The sex may have been great (my H said it wasn't...I suspect he just didn't want to hurt my feelings more), but you can take charge and make it great for you and him.
Starting over is just that. A fresh start. If there were things about the past that you would like to change, now's the time. Sure, it's scary. But if you stay bound by fear, all you'll have is the same old relationship. And I know you're a strong girl. So find a way to reach out to him in your strength.
