I'm so sorry you're upset, and want to give up. I understand. I think this recent development with H is part of his withdrawal from OW - and he can't see himself in any other role with you as a result. Give him time - focus on your own goals (and yes, I think your financial independance is a great goal - even if you find reason to work things out with him in the future) and let him recover from the depression he seems to be going through. He seems to be resentful that he's doing what he thinks is required of someone that loves his family and provides for it. He's growing and leaving behind some of the luxuries and excitement of a more youthful life. Eventually he'll begin to see the fun you two have together as exciting - right now it just doesn't compare to the affair he's given up. Remember, real love vs. excitement - that's where cheating spouses get confused - don't go there yourself. Do whatever it takes to have fun yourself - GAL, focus on you, but continue to love him. No pressure. Even if you're heading towards the big D, you can do these things, but you're keeping the door cracked open just in case. . .
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
