well, that makes 2 of us, I just want to ML w/ him every night/morn he's home, and I actually hear from him the dreaded "i'm too tired" quite a bit of times.
At the danger of repeating myself, here we go. I have 2 kids, 3.5 and 8, bedtime is 9 and no matter how much they beg they can never sleep in my bed for the night, once in a blue moon the little one comes over, but that's if she's sick. The 8yr old does want to stay up, and I know the little monkey is playing 'til way past his bed time, but the rule is :lights off, door closed. I can hear him making airplane noises up to 11pm, but as my friend says "I dont' care if they are bowling in their room, as long as they stay there". I too used to let the kids stay up 'til 11, I work ft and missed them, but no more late nights, plus, with school, kids can't be up after 9 (I know lots of parents w/kids going to bed at 8!)
If your H goes to bed early, sometimes go to him after the kids are asleep, it used to work w/my H pre-bomb, he'd sleep early to get some rest so when I was free I'd show up in a nighty.
I know your 5yr old ends up in bed everytime, and that they pounded the door to come in when you got a lock, that has got to stop. My 3yr old knows I don't allow her to run around after I tuck her in, make your intentions clear and scort the 5yr old back to his room if he comes at midnight or before 8am, do it 'til the cows come home and he gets it that now mommy has to rest and he needs to say in his room.
I so hear you abour the WAS being the ones we want to woe us back, but the vicious circle has to be broken somewhere, back in the pre-bomb era my H was the one coming after me and I was the one rejecting him. No more, I will be there for him, i wish for more affection but will be happy for what he can give me now, as he told me long long ago, the only thing he had to go by was the way I was, so this process of them warming up to us is a slow painful road.
Hang in there toots)))))))))))))))))
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
